Saturday, September 1, 2007

More G1 & New Japan Fun




G1 Climax Tournament

First Round, Block A

Akebono v. The Giant Bernard



Most American fans would think this would be a suck-fest of epic proportions. Me? I'll give it a chance. Bernard-o, also known as A-Train, has significantly improved over the past year or so, yet the latest in a growing list of crappy American big men who have popped up in Japan and learned not only how to wrestle, but wrestle well.




Akebono of course, is a rather large tub of suck, but is fun on some levels and the fans over there seemingly love watching him. Or so we're told at least.




The bell rings and Bernard goes right for Akebono, all pissed off that this fat ass would even think he should be here. He keeps up with the clubberin' before the referee rips him off and admonishes him for fat people discrimination. Bernard gets caught up in that heated discussion a little too long and Akebono hits him in the balls, pissed that this guy doesn't know how to treat, you know, a REAL celebrity.




Akebono uncorcks some good nut work before moving into more of the standard, plodding big man stuff; standing on Bernard, wrenching his head, etc. Akebono finally has enough and tossed Bernard to the outside.




Things take a turn for the weirdly alright when Akebono, who looks like a giant potato with tooth picks for legs, gets tripped up by Bernard and the big, bad Bostonian takes a chair and nails him in the leg with it. I'm usually not as fan of big man limb stuff because big men shouldn't be DOING that kind of stuff. They should be punching you and sitting on you and eating your family whole, not doing top wrist locks. But for whatever reason, it works alright here and Bernard might as well be wearing pink and calling himself Bret Hart-o.




Even more shocking, there's so decently done selling from Akebono here when he starts hitting his leg to get feeling back into it. Good stuff. The two trade some bombs before Bernard-o gets a rush and ducks under an Akebono lariat and hits a pretty impressive back drop driver. He goes to follow with a big boot but Akebono stops him, sends him off the ropes and buries him with a Samoan drop, thus returning the favor.


Somehow we end up on the outside and Akebono tosses Bernard around for a little while before whipping him into the ring post. He lines up Bernard for a sumo splash, but Bernard ducks for cover and the sumo champ clatters into the ring post.




Bernard figures it's time to stop fucking around so he goes and retrieves the time keeper's table and sets it up and then puts the seven million pound Akebono on it. He goes to the second rope and dives off, crushing Akebono and the table beneath him. Both are out of it on the floor and the official counts to 10 for the double count out.




This is a fun, short big man match. Both guys are more or less protected here, as both guys ate each other's best stuff and neither came out looking weak. Bernard's the token monster in New Japan these days, so you can't really put Akebono over him. Akebono is the celebrity draw whose lending some credibility to the show, so you can't have Bernard go over him either. Nice safe result with enough crowd popping stuff to keep folks interested. Even smarks. **




G1 Climax Tournament

Block-A

The Giant Bernard v. Togi Makabe




As i've said a few times, Bernard is probably the most improved wrestler in the world while Togi Makabe is probably the most fun wrestler to watch in the world. Both struggle with their anger, so this match is any therapists' dream.




The match starts out and surprisingly, Bernard is more of the cuddly teddy bear with the crowd and all nice guy wrestling and stuff. Makabe is even feeling good tonight so he offers his hand as a gesture of sportsmanship. Then he kicks Bernard in the stomach and goes all heelish. Bernard doesn't like that so he just takes Makabe and dumps him on his head and begins throwing him around like a rag doll.




Bernard makes a bit of a mistake though, tossing Makabe to the outside and chasing him. Makabe loves to brawl and loves to play with the many toys that can be found around the ring. Bernard finds out he probably should have kept this a fist fight, as he gets quickly whipped to the barricade. Makabe gets a table set up and then walks over to Bernard with a look on his face that can best be described as:







Anyways, he whips Bernard into the table before letting the crowd know he thinks they're all homos. Makabe makes HIS mistake of the match by taking the silliness back into the ring. He controls things for a little while, but soon, Bernard-o makes an awesome, awesome babyface comeback. He drops Makabe on his head, hits some big boots and hits the vader bomb out of the corner for an awesome near fall, but Makabe kicks out.


Makabe is an awesome cranky heel because as much as the crowd boos him for his antics, it's the toughness that makes the crowd respect-hate him and him taking all of Bernard's shots are almost adding to the heel heat. Bernard picks him up to put the exclaimation point on things, but accidentally hits the referee with Makabe's legs. Ironically, Makabe DIDN'T try to cheat..


Great babyface-heel work here again with Bernard turning around to tend to the referee IMMEDIATELY. The smarmy Makabe is on the other side and goes to jump Bernard but instead of doing the usual heel jumps face, foreign object thing, Bernard cuts him off and kills him with a body slam and goes for a cover with no referee in a pretty hot spot.


Bernard is frustrated so he goes to revive the ref, again, taking his eye off Makabe. Makabe rolls to the corner and retrieves his chain and nails the big man with it. The referee gets up with this disgusted look on his face, knowing Makabe probably cheated, but he can't DQ him. Bernard kicks out in another hot near fall. Makabe kills him with a lariat and THAT doesn't work either. Bernard's pretty much KO'd though, and Makabe knows it. He mounts the top rope and hits a flying knee drop to the back of Bernard's face and no one, not even super man, is kicking out.


Makabe is an incredibly hate-able douche after the match, flipping off the crowd andBernard, waving 'buh bye' as he walks towards the back. Bernard goes ballistic in the middle of the ring and then puts a nasty beat down on his cornermen and thrashes about the ringside area, going all heel himself.


This is another great match from both these guys. Personally, i'd LOVE to see them do a jerk face heel with body guard type thing who eventually break up and feud sort of thing with these two. Work-wise, this is really mediocre stuff, but is made a lot better by good timing (especially by Bernard) and patience with developing certain spots as opposed to rushing them. Makabe plays a killer heel, too. It's another match up that's seriously hard to hate and is carried by outstanding character work onthe part of Makabe. Bernard-o brings the goods too. Definately worth checking out. **3/4



IWGP Heavyweight Championship


Yuji Nagata v. Togi Makabe


This is a total debacle, utterly out of control and one of the most (if not THE) most fun match of the year for me so far. Makabe is just a nut in this. He's great as the guy who is giong to play by his own rules, even if it means he loses. He just wants to hit people with chains, bleed and stab you in the head with scissors. Fun.


Nagata's totally chippy in this too. One of my favorite scene in the match is the two dissapearing through a door in the side of an arena, and by the time they pop back up, Nagata's the one in control and he's got this look on his face like he's dragging his kid out a toy store entrance. It's funny stuff.


Makabe's stooges rule in this too, constantly causing trouble, and are made even more stoogish and fun when Nagata's corner stooges try to pry them off their leader, as if they were expecting them to play fair or something, then getting jacked up pretty brutal. Nagata snaps flag poles, Makabe bleeds and the referee even fights back. Technical wrestling blows. That's what this match says. For now, i'll agree. No seriously though, this is way too much fun. ***1/2


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